Thursday, September 25, 2014

I agree with 100% of everything Emma Watson said.

I hate inequality. It’s the absolute worst.

And ending gender inequality will take all of us. Equal rights for women requires male participation too, because males are an intricate part of our civilized society as well, and for women to become equal we must include those whom we deserve to coexist alongside.

Emma Watson says this all quite beautifully. And then she adds the following…

“I think it’s right that I should be paid the same as my male counterparts… I think it's right that I should be able to make decisions about my own body…”

At which point she has to stop because uproarious applause breaks out.

She had made numerous powerful points, with not even a single audible clap, and then came a line which we all know is synonymous for “abortion rights" and the crowd is in a tizzy.

And here's the deal, on the surface I absolutely, whole-heartedly agree with what she is saying. Our bodies are ours. You can no more tell me I have to get a tattoo across my forehead than you can demand I bear children I choose not to conceive.

…However, if that child is already in existence, well, then suddenly we have another body, another set of autonomous rights, to consider. That’s what everyone keeps wanting to forget. I'm fairly certain this fact will receive no applause from the UN.

Yet, if we hop back over to the issue of equality for a second, we’ll find it’s spelled out quite clearly there. If a man murders a pregnant woman, it’s a double homicide. If a male abuses his pregnant girlfriend and kills the baby, it’s murder. If a guy secretly drugs his partner with an abortifacient causing her to miscarry, it’s a crime.

When a woman ends the life of an unborn child however, it’s merely a "choice."

So much for equality, Emma.

My Abortion Story

Originally posted on Stand True.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

New Nail Polish Detects Date Rape Drug; Infuriates Feminists

I hate victim-blaming. It's one of the few things in the world I could say truly disgusts me, and not be speaking hyperbolically. There is no excuse -- ever -- for sexual assault in any form. There is no excuse for rape. However, even with all that said… I can't say there's any reason to ignore our need to protect ourselves.
If we admit we live in a rape culture, why are my fellow feminists in uproar at the thought that women should be taught and equipped to protect themselves from something so heinous?
Yes, teach men not to rape, definitely. I could talk about it until I ran out of breath. But to neglect to equip a woman to defend herself from assault in what we already acknowledge is a rape culture isn't just ignorant, it's batshit insane. It's like saying "We live in a burglary culture. No one should ever lock their doors."
We shouldn't have to protect ourselves from sexual assault. But if we can and need to we should be able to if we so choose. Affecting the culture at large does not and should not require an absolute abandonment of practicality and common sense on an individual basis.
Let's hope for and work towards a future in which those who would be victims don't have to worry, and those who would be aggressors would never think to commit violent acts. Let's stop blaming the victim, and stop placing fault on someone who didn't consent to what unfolded. In the meantime, why are we shaming dudes for making nail polish? For trying to help? For actually doing something to make rape less likely to occur, for someone, somewhere?
Complain all you want, I guess. But I, for one, won't be turning in my stun gun so I can jump on this "Screw protecting ourselves!" weird feminist band wagon.


Post by Tori Long

Booty Positivity? Sorry Guys, But We're Popping The Myth That This Has Anything To Do With You...

A new pop star has been born, America! Meghan Trainor, a 20-year-old from Massachusetts, possesses the #2 spot on iTunes for her single “All About That Bass”. For the record, I love this song. It’s catchy and hilarious and I totally relate to it. But I don’t think it should be heralded as the big “F-You!” to the man (or men in general) that it has been. Although I don’t think this is her intention, it’s easy for girls to interpret this song to mean that bigger is better. Yes, some guys will naturally be more attracted to heavier girls, but I don’t think we’re doing women any favors by saying their figure is less “womanly” than another’s. For years I’ve had to deal with insinuations (or outright observations) that I’m a little bigger than what’s ideal. I love that some areas of our culture are getting over the fact that not every girls is going to be perfectly trim, but that is not an excuse to tell thinner girls that they’re not good enough either! Let’s just agree that women come in all shapes and sizes, okay? Some girls have flat butts, some have big boobs, some (like me) have hardcore muffin tops. And that’s okay, because WHO CARES? “Yeah, my mama she told me don't worry about your size She says, "Boys like a little more booty to hold at night."” Oooh! So it’s okay for my jeans to be size 16 because guys like big butts? Um, no. Since when is the fact that guys will like to cuddle with you a reason to finally be happy in your own skin? “Since always”, you say? I say it’s time we start busting that myth. I like my body. Not because I have “all the right junk in all the right places”, but because this is how my body is and until I decide to change it, I might as well be happy with it! If you think your body is acceptable because some guys prefer whatever size you are, if you wear sweatpants out because some guys might find it sexy, if you skip makeup because guys find the “natural” look’re missing the point. It’s just another way of basing your appearance off what guys think is hot. Sometimes I wear outfits that, I admit, could be more flattering. And guess what? I like it anyway! And sometimes that’s good enough. It makes me a little nervous to say that because we live in such a “Me” culture. But I feel like this is one of the times when girls seem to forget that they should think of how they feel first. It hurts my heart that girls do their hair this way or buy that swimsuit so they can draw the attention of guys and feel desired. When a good guy likes you, it wont just be because you have a great figure. A woman is so much more than just a body. Let’s start acting like it.


Post by Elizabeth May Vos

Monday, September 1, 2014

Why This Video Matters To Me Personally

Most of us think we know what rape is. Whenever someone forces themself onto another person without consent, it's sexual assault. It's very black and white... except when it isn't.

It took me ten years and ultimately a very honest and kind friend to tell me that when I was "taken advantage of" in high school that one time, I had actually been raped. I mean, had I said "no"? Yes. Had I been crying? Yes. Had I asked him to stop? I had. But in my mind, because he had not beaten me up and wasn't holding me down, it wasn't really rape - it was just a teenage guy "taking advantage of the situation." For years I used that term. For years I made excuses for his behavior.

We live in an increasingly violent world, where most adolescent boys are brought up on a steady stream of pornography. The images they see are far from those in their father's Playboy. They are inundated with women being dominated, overpowered, and placed increasingly in states of pain. Their natural, instinctual reaction to protect their partners from harm, or to stop when their partners are expressing discomfort, has now been replaced with the exact opposite. Inflicting pain becomes a turn-on. These boys confuse faces twisting in agony with pleasure based on the pornography they've fed their minds for years. Sexual intimacy is rapidly being replaced with violence in our modern-day society.

And it's not just the guys who are learning this. Young women are constantly being told that their power lies in their sexuality; every magazine stand and billboard screams it. You want to exude confidence and strength? Become the ultimate sex kitten. Act like the girl in the porn or like Anastasia in Fifty Shades of Grey.

I didn't get up and run away that day because the very thing that was supposed to make me confident and strong was now breaking me - making me feel scared and weak. I froze. Between the two of us, we'd created the perfect storm: a girl so insecure that she couldn't forcefully demand that the boy stop violating her, and a boy who thought "no" meant "yes," and that "stop" meant "go."

As I watch Live Action's latest undercover investigation into Planned Parenthood, SexEd, I want to jump through the screen and shake the nurse who thinks it's okay to talk to a 15-year-old girl about "safe words" and BDSM - who's telling this girl that words like "no" and "stop" can get "mixed up when you're having intercourse," or that "usually a lot of people will say 'stop' even though it feels good." She has no idea of the long-term damage she's doing - or, honestly, maybe she does have an idea, and it's simply good for business.

When we tell teens to engage in this type of destructive behavior, we are telling them they are not worthy of love. We are saying they do not deserve to be cherished, that they deserve only to be hurt. We are telling them abuse is affection. And furthermore, when we instruct them that "stop" is not a good safe word because "usually people say 'stop' even though it feels good," we are reinforcing the lie, to a generation of confused young men, that yeah, she really did want it. And we are telling the girls hurt by these young men that they were probably asking for it.


Post by Destiny